How to protect a girl from bullies. How to protect a girl from bullies

Approximately with this question, almost all pathological relationships begin (except those that begin with the birth or conception by one participant of an unhealthy relationship of another). They often end with the fact that one pen grows to the size of elephants, while the other feels that he has suffered great damage, including preventing the formation of new close relationships.

I'll try to roughly formulate why this happens. Our psychological problems can be roughly explained as the consequences of facing too difficult experiences that the psyche could not process. In particular, this happens when the child is faced with problems that are not for his age. The experience of such an experience forms, firstly, a great fear of a repeated encounter with such an experience, secondly, a certain distorted picture of the world that explains what happened, and thirdly, a body of psychological defenses that reproduce the unsuccessful experience of coping with a painful experience. That is, trauma separates a person from the world, he begins to live in such a subreality that allows him, on the one hand, to never directly encounter these feelings, on the other hand, to spin around them all the time like a heifer on a string.

The active desire of someone else in this situation to help - i.e. guard against triggers, challenge painful thoughts, not allow worry, self-doubt, suffer pain, allow him something unpleasant or uncomfortable for himself out of pity - in general , the desire to adapt to the injury as much as possible leads to the fact that two people are already running around the injury. And the unhealthy picture of the world gets amazing nourishment, because when someone else believes in your monster under the bed, you finally understand that the monster is real. As a result, the desire to help turns into an aggravation of the corrals.

What can still be done for a close friend who is driven:

Advise to seek professional help from the outside, to assist in the process itself. If there is no possibility or desire to look for a psychologist, then you can, for example, look for high-quality literature on the desired topic.

Recognize that your loved one is a strong and mature person who can handle their problem. You are with him not to save him, but to love him, and not because he will be lost without you, but because you like him. There are not very many people who are really capable of disappearing from their psychological problems, and those who are, need the help of professionals, not volunteers.

Separate your emotions from his emotions. It’s hard when a loved one suffers, but we all suffer sometimes, this is an important part of life and experience, you can’t take someone else’s suffering for yourself, but you can force another to displace and suppress it. All people have the right to emotions, suffering and problems, those loved ones who help the most are those who remain strong, calm and able to continue to act in their interests when someone is suffering nearby, but at the same time not to depreciate or pretend that nothing not happening. Who knows how to stay close, but within their boundaries.

Maintain boundaries, do not let the bad state of a loved one affect you too much. Obviously, the condition of loved ones always affects us, but if the whole life revolves around it (and this is not quite a small child and not a seriously ill person), then something is wrong in the relationship.

Express your sympathy and desire for your loved one to do well, but do not allow him to break contact with reality and do not interfere with clashes with it. That is, if a person breaks from one thought, you should not convince him that this thought is wrong or will never come true, the solution to internal problems never lies in the outside world. You have to face your fears, and it's best when it happens in a warm and supportive environment.

Don't give indulgences, don't let the person treat you worse when he's in a bad state than when he's in a good one, don't give him more. The psyche instantly adapts to the secondary benefit.

How to behave if you are with a companion

Let's talk about such an important, burning and painful issue as self defense with a partner or with a child.

What to do if you are not alone?

How to defend when there is someone next to you who is unable to protect himself? Because he is not as healthy and strong as you, he does not have special skills.

Hollywood cinema, as well as oriental action films, impose a myth on us when Mr. and Mrs. Smith come face to face, putting their Colts on each other's shoulders, start to make noise, spinning in a circle.

In general, if your companion is not Mrs. Smith, then most likely she does not have such data. And you will have to protect her.

Your companion does not have special self-defense skills

In general, most likely your companion does not have special self-defense skills. Moreover, when you see how you famously knock out your opponents teeth, how you break through their chests, send them to the nearest Christmas tree with a low throw instead of New Year's toys hang and do other outrages, most likely the girl will become ill, because her delicate psyche is not adapted to such lawlessness and violence.

Therefore, methods should be fast, short, imperceptible, it is desirable that the young lady does not see them, and the whole collision should end as quickly as possible. So step by step...

One of the interviewees for the training told an interesting story that he once found himself with his wife against two attackers. When he began to fight with them, his wife held him with the words "dear what are you, etc.". Both husband and wife got it. Here, here is the reaction in women. Those. a woman can stop you from protecting her and yourself trying to grab your hands. As a result, not only you will be beaten, but she will also get it.

Everything must be over quickly, AS FAST AS POSSIBLE!

Not always a fight starts with a blow in your direction, with a blow, a look or an insulting word in your direction. Aggression can go to a girl, not only verbal, but also physical. It won't always be gopniks. Often - drunk drivers who abruptly taxied around the corner, etc. You won't be able to say: "Careful, dear, move away from the edge of the road" and something else there, like the dear one will just be swept away, crushed soft-boiled.

That's why very first what you have to learn is to take your companion out of the line of threat, out of the line of attack. This is done in a very easy, beautiful maneuver. If you held the young lady with your left hand by her right hand, then you simply turn the body around your axis and transfer the girl to the other side of your body, under your right hand. In this case, your body acts as an axis of rotation. That's all. A person is easily and quickly transferred to the other side.

Your body acts not only as an axis of rotation, but also as a buffer that protects the young lady from criminal encroachments.

The scoundrel is trying to grab, grope your young lady

second moment The scoundrel(s) may be trying to grab your hands in parallel so that you do nothing in response. Save yourself first, save the woman second., because if you climb to save a woman, and they give you a blow on the back of the head, then no one will help you or the woman. Grips are knocked down with short, hard blows to pain points, while doing this, do not forget to strike at the knee, shin and groin with the foot.

How and what we work. Since we are holding the girl, for example, with her left hand by her right hand, we will work, that is, we will save her only with our right hand and right foot.

Otherwise:

• if you try to use your left hand, you will release the girl, and they can drag her somewhere into the bushes or she will run away in hysterics, in a panic,
• if you try to strike with your left foot without letting go of the girl from your left hand, then her body will again act as an axis of rotation, and she will be pulled in a completely unnecessary direction.

It's easier to try it out and make sure it's true than it is to explain it in words.

Safe distance

When you are with a young lady, the question of maintaining a safe distance. Everything that invades your personal zone and shows aggression must be fought back.

Therefore, with your free hand, you apply a whip to the eyes, a whip to the most vulnerable, painful point under the nose - this is a very painful effect, it can pierce a dead drunk and even supposedly not feeling anything with a current. You hit on the genitals, with your foot you hit on the shin, on the knee. You knock down the grips from yourself, then from the girl and as quickly as possible remove them in the direction from which you came or in the direction where there are people.

On the way, your woman should call on a mobile phone, call the police.

When the attackers try to get close to you, it's time to go into frenzied berserker mode - bare your face and start yelling as loudly as possible: "meat, blood, meat, blood". At the same time, perform tearing, scratching movements with your hands, as if you were tearing meat. Any normal, sane person would be horrified and frightened, thinking that Frankenstein had come to life again. On the way back from the place of the battle, it will not be superfluous for the young lady to get the keys on the go in order to enter the entrance as quickly as possible.

Your body is a buffer, an axis of rotation. Working with free hand. Do not get stuck in a fight - maximum two hits for each attacker. In the face and in the genitals, or with a foot in the shin, in the knee and we leave, we leave the line of attack.

Seeing two or three types who looked at you and the girl, whispered and moved towards you, prepare a means of self-defense in advance.

You must be prepared

You are a man and you must take care in advance, prepare in advance for possible aggression in your direction and, there, in the direction of the girl. Therefore you must be prepared, must have self-defense skills, at least elementary. Be sure to carry with you, if not a knife, then at least some means of self-defense - yawaru or a bunch of keys. You should always be prepared for the fact that you will have to protect both yourself and your companion.

If you are just a teenager, then if you are beaten, you simply will not go to school for two weeks. And if you are the face of the company, if you have your own family, beloved woman, children, then the fact that you will lose your ability to work is you risk everything. That is, you endanger not only your life, your health, but also endanger your loved ones, their well-being and future.

If you want more free information on self defense and confidence

and get free

• The book "3 most effective self-defense techniques: what distinguishes the victim from the predator?"
• Audio course "Fear and the fight against fear"
• Audio course "The whole truth about self-defense"
• Video course of the training "Baklanka: the secrets of a hooligan fight
• Audio course "How to maintain confidence in critical situations
• Video course "Male charisma and confidence. How to influence people

Spring..evening...embankment...starry sky...couples kissing on benches...and you walking in an embrace with your beloved girl (well, maybe not beloved). Everything is fine..romance.Your walk is smooth is coming to an end, you are heading home. You can already see the girl's entrance ... and then a voice from behind: "Hey, dear, there will be no trifles!?". You turn around and see three people, like "gop-stop", who are approaching you, obviously not with the intention of asking where their friend Vasya lives. Well, friend, in such a situation, I can only sympathize with you, most likely you and your girlfriend will part, but no, not with each other, but with your valuable things.

Of course, everything starts tritely: "Is there a trifle?" or "Can't you smoke?", and then how will you behave. If you say I don’t smoke, well, like an athlete, and you say it confidently, then there are two options, either the collision begins, or the guys really just wanted to smoke or shoot little things. In the second case, they will leave, in the first case, you hit. No, if you were alone, no doubt, one (preferably the main one) to give in the butt and quickly dump, it's even better to just dump without hitting a quick run away. But you're with a girl, can you imagine what they'll do to her if you start a fight and you can't put them all down? So don't think you're a superhero and get into a fight. Now I'll tell you why. According to the "concepts" gop-stop never touch a guy with a girl, hence the conclusion that either stray (from another city) or even complete scumbags stuck to you. And the first and second will not be difficult to beat both of you. So if they require a phone and everything else, give it without a twinge of conscience. If a girl is smart, then she will understand everything that no things are worth health, let alone life. They will pick up and calmly go away.

This is my opinion, and not only mine, all sane people will do this. So think about it.

But the article is basically about how to protect your girlfriend. Well, if you are a professional boxer or karateka, then I think it will not be difficult for you to break three stoned dead people, but! There is always this stupid BUT. They are with weapons, 99% that they have a knife, do you need it!? In general, the choice is yours. I suggest the following:

1. If you approach, or approach with a clear intention to rob, try to send the girl somewhere, preferably for help. Tell her to run there to the kiosk, or to Masha's neighbor. The main thing is that she stays safe. If you are alone, it will be easier.

2. It was not possible to send the girl to a safe place. This is already sad. But still ... If they begin to press you, answer confidently, don’t be afraid, just don’t dare them! Not in any case. If they see that you are not afraid of them, they will think three times why they need extra resistance and attention drawn to themselves?

3. If you feel that they are crushing the "bazaar" hit! The main thing is to hit first. Just hit the most important thing! Hit sharply and unexpectedly, put all the anger into the blow! It is advisable to hit in the middle of a phrase, very unexpectedly! You need to hit in the nose, there will be a sea of ​​blood if you kiss, it will be unrealistically painful. Hit and run! If with a girl then you should talk to her about such possible situations, and as soon as you hit she should run for help! Those two who stood with him will be clearly shocked by your actions. Give the girl the opportunity to run away, and beat those two yourself. Hit in the groin, put your fingers in the eyes. Etc. By the way, you can also make the first blow in the groin.

4. Start a fight only if you are sure that you can, if not knock out the first one, then hurt him like hell.

5. It is better to give everything of value, sooner or later they will be imprisoned or killed. Why do you become their killer, or worse, die from them?

I hope you act like a man and not like a superhero. Good luck!

You have a girl with you, just think about what these "villains" can do to her if you don't kill everyone. Protect your girl!

Summer evening... starry sky... couples kissing on benches... and you walking along the embankment with your beloved (or maybe not beloved girl). Everything is just wonderful, the air smells of romance. Your walk is gradually coming to an end and it's time to head home.

Having reached almost the entrance of your beloved, you hear a voice: "Hey kid, won't there be change?" And then you naturally turn around and see a cheerful company of the “gop-stop” type, who clearly wants to take something away from you ... And most likely, both you and your girlfriend will say goodbye to your values.

Naturally, it all starts tritely: "Can't you smoke?" or "Is there any change?", the main thing in such a situation is your behavior. You can safely say that, they say, an athlete does not smoke, and then there are only two options: a collision will begin or the guys really wanted to shoot little things. If you were without your beloved, it goes without saying that one (preferably the leader) should be kicked in the end and dumped, but it’s better to just run away. But you can't! With you, the girl, just think about what these "villains" can do to her if you don't kill everyone. No need to make yourself a superhero and climb on the rampage. After all, according to the concepts of “gop-stop”, no one will climb if there is a girl next to you. We can conclude that you ran into stray or complete scumbags. It will not be difficult for both of you to beat the two of you. Therefore, if they demand jewelry and a phone, give it away without a twinge of conscience. After all, if your girlfriend is smart, she will understand everything.

No, well, if you are a professional karateka or boxer, then I think it will not be difficult to break stoned dead people, but! They may be armed, 99% of them have a knife, do you need it? But the choice is yours. I will suggest the following:

- If they come with the intention of robbing, send your girlfriend somewhere to “walk”. The main thing is that she is safe. One will be easier.

- If you can’t send the girl, it’s already sad. But you hold on! They begin to press - answer confidently, but not rudely.

- If you begin to understand that you are being crushed by the "bazaar" - strike first! Just choose a leader. Hit abruptly and unexpectedly. It is advisable to strike in the middle of a phrase. If you are in a relationship with a girl, talk to her about such a possible situation: after your blow, she should rush for help. And the rest of the scumbags will obviously be shocked by your unexpected filing. Give your girlfriend the opportunity to run away, and then beat the rest.

- Start a fight only if you are confident in your abilities and fighting qualities.

- It is better to give everything of value, soon they will be imprisoned, and possibly killed. Why would you want to be their killer?

Act like a real man, not like a superman! Good luck!